Be cautious and careful not to make a mistake.

Be cautious and careful not to make a mistake. Beware not to take a sentimental decision. Be careful not to be subjected and affected by digressive factors. It would be very difficult for you to cope and deal with an unsuitable, unequal and heterogeneous, and inconsistent spouse. Do not ever tell yourself: “For now, let us marry! If we cannot live together in the days to come, we can divorce and separate!” Drive such an idea totally out of your mind.

Divorce is a very difficult thing and sometimes even impossible, particularly when there are children. Encourage and uphold the idea that I want to choose a spouse with whom I intent to spend a prosperous and happy life.” You must burn your boats and accumulate and concentrate all your sense to choose a permanent and lifelong partner. Exercise extreme care!!!

As far as the recommendations about a quick and swift marriage, are concerned, which we discussed in the previous chapters, it does not mean haste, disregard and neglect. Instead, speed must be with precision, accuracy, and carefulness. And these two (speed and accuracy) are not contradictions to each other; instead, it hastes which is in contrast to precision.

SUBTILITY IN SELECTION, SMOOTHNESS IN MARRIAGE When we consider the collection of laws of Islam with regard to marriage, we conclude that. Islam has commanded to be easy, lenient, indulgent and simple most of the matters pertaining to marriage; such as dowry, wealth, ceremonies, rituals, and customs, but it has ordered carefulness in ‘spouse selection’.

For example: “Be lenient … do not exercise extreme care.” “The best marriage is the easiest one.” “The best of wives are those whose dowry sum is small and their expenditure and upkeep is low.” “But when it come to the discussion of ‘spouse selection’ and ‘its criteria and standards’, Islam says be very careful.

“Avoid the greenery (herbs) growing over a sewer (cesspool).” “Avoid marrying stupid and silly (insane) ones.” “See what you are putting around your neck.” And tense of other caution and warnings. So be completely mindful and alert that these two kinds of ordains are not mixed up an taken erroneously. Leniency and easy attitude have their own place; whereas minuteness, precision, carefulness, and strictness have their own.

Everything is suitable in its ow place.” CRITERIA OF SPOUSE SELECTION We must have certain standards for the selection of a spouse.