This team consists of two mediators...

This team consists of two mediators; one chosen by the wife’s family, and one by the husband’s. They may be of the couple’s family or unrelated. The Quran states: وَ إِنْ خِفْتُمْ شِقَاقَ بَيْنِهِمَا فَابْعَثُواْ حَكَمًا مِّنْ أَهْلِهِ وَ حَكَمًا مِّنْ أَهْلِهَا إِن يُرِيدَا إِصْلاَحًا يُوَفِّقِ اللّهُ بَيْنَهُمَا إِنَّ اللّهَ كَانَ عَلِيمًا خَبِيرًا “And if you fear a breach between the two, then choose an arbitrator from his people and an arbitrator from her people.

If they both desire reconciliation, Allah shall effectuate concord among them. Surely, Allah is All-knowing, All-aware.” [^7] In order to bring about reconciliation, the team of arbitrators arranges a meeting with the wife and husband. They unearth the problem, hear out both sides with punctiliousness and fairness and advise, in friendship and love, each person regarding their mistakes and shortcomings. They remind each of the spouses of their responsibilities.

Then they enjoin the couple to forgiveness, tolerance, observance of marital duties, and determination to fortify the holy institution of their marriage and family. They also warn them of the detrimental effects of discord and separation. In this manner, they restore harmony among the pair. However, it must be expressed that the reconciliation brought about by Islamic arbitrators is different from the settlement that results from the force of law.

Judicial settlement is like the placating of two partners or neighbors or two persons who are hostile towards one another by obstructing them from encroaching upon each other’s rights, whereas the reconciliation brought about by the team of arbitrators has nothing to do with judicial constraint; rather, it results from rectifying rancor, uprooting the source of the disputes, endeavoring to create mutual understanding, consolidating familial love, heartening the couple regarding their life together, and normalizing the relations between them.

The merits of this method over the modern judicial method are obviously far superior. If, however, after careful scrutiny and necessary action, the arbitrators realize that the conflicts are excessively deep-seated and that the flames of marital love and affection have been completely quenched and there is no hope for concord after encouraging forgiveness and forbearance, they may leave the couple to their own devices or they advise them to seek a divorce.

Another instrument that may prevent divorce or at least forestall it is the payment of Mihr .

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