James Bander...

James Bander, the head of the Civil Institute for Human Relations in New York, said: "The first theory described by the philosophers is the view represented in the eternal saying: 'Love for your brother what you love for yourself'".

It is derived from the theory that helps in attracting people, and regards it as the first and most important step in reaching "an attractive personality." The author of the book, "How to Attract Friends", Dayel Carnigy has said: "Show your concern toward others to the best of your ability, because it is your wealth which will increase in growth whenever you spend it." The question here is this: Is the path of attaining an Islamic and social personality - the one which makes you love and be loved - you like it and other people like it - practica-ble?

(With all simplicity, we can say: Yes…but!) The word 'but', in most instances, changes things upside down, but here it is just a reminder, reminding us that the 'yes' requires a particular and special effort in order to make it good and perfect. Because the art of social relations is like any other art, we cannot obtain it just like that, rather it is an art, which requires action and endeavor.

It is possible, in the initial stage, that we will find it difficult, but with time it will become enjoyable; a social and spiritual enjoyment.

One day you will find yourself opening hearts to those close to you saying: "I am ready to let you into my heart… I am ready to do it!" By this, you will see that the closed hearts of others toward you will be opened to you once they see and feel the sincerity of your love and respect towards them, because there is nothing more attractive to love than love, to the heart more than the heart, to kindness more than kindness, to good relations than good relations.

An experienced philosopher said: "The possessors of intellects have many enviers, but those who possess hearts, their friends are many." It is, unanimously, accepted by people that man is a social being that attracts and is attracted, to the extent that if he lives alone for a period of time he will become wild. In both cases - happiness and misery - he needs someone who will accompany him, who will share his happiness at the time of happiness, and likewise, his sorrow at the time of sorrow.