Divorce is a very difficult thing and sometimes even impossible...

Divorce is a very difficult thing and sometimes even impossible, particularly when there are children. Encourage and uphold the idea that I want to choose a spouse with whom I intent to spend a prosperous and happy life.” You must burn your boats and accumulate and concentrate all your sense to choose a permanent and life long partner. Exercise extreme care!!!

As far as the recommendations about a quick and swift marriage, are concerned, which we discussed in the previous chapters, it does not mean haste, disregard and neglect. Instead, speed must be with precision, accuracy, and carefulness. And these two (speed and accuracy) are not contradictions to each other; instead, it haste which is in contrast to precision.

Subtlety in Selection, Smoothness In Marriage When we consider the collection of laws of Islam with regard to marriage, we conclude that: Islam has commanded to be easy, lenient, indulgent and simple most of the matters pertaining to marriage; such as dowry, wealth, ceremonies, rituals, and customs, but it has ordered carefulness in 'spouse selection'. For example. “Be lenient ...

do not exercise extreme care.” “The best marriage is the easiest one.” “The best of wives are those whose dowry sum is small and their expenditure and upkeep is low.” “But when it come to the discussion of 'spouse selection' and 'its criteria and standards' ,Islam says be very careful. إياكم و خضراء الدمن. “Avoid the greenery (herbs) growing over a sewer (cesspool).” إياكم و تزويج الحمقاء. “Avoid marrying stupid and silly (insane) ones.” فانظر ما تقلده.

“See what you are putting around your neck.” And tense of other caution and warnings. So be completely mindful and alert that these two kinds of ordains are not mixed up an taken erroneously. Leniency and easy attitude have their own place; whereas minuteness, precision, carefulness, and strictness have their own. Everything is suitable in its own place.” Criteria of Spouse Selection We must have certain standards for the selection of a spouse.

That is to say, girls and boys must have criteria and know what kind of spouse they wish to have and with what qualities and virtues. This is the actual work. It is much like someone who wants to travel, so he must fix and specify his destination and then start the journey. But if he only knows that he needs to travel but does not have any aim, objective or destination in his mind, he wanders around and gets lost.