Help Your Child Compensate Our task as parents is to serve as a confident ally...

Help Your Child Compensate Our task as parents is to serve as a confident ally, encouraging when children are distressed, intervening when threats are overwhelming, and giving them the tools to overcome the obstacles. One of those tools is compensation. An Individual counterbalances weaknesses by capitalizing on his strengths. It is our job to help our children find those strengths. Perhaps a child can establish his niche in arts.

May be he can build model airplanes or keep rabbits or play football. Nothing is more risky than sending a child into adolescence with no skills, no unique knowledge, and no means of compensating. He must be able to say: “I may not be the most popular boy in the school, but I am the best football player in the team.” I recommend that parents assess a child’s strength, and then select a skill with the best chance for success. See that he gets through the first stage.

If you find you have made a mistake, start again on something else. But don’t let inertia keep you from, teaching him a skill. Help Your Child Compete A parent who opposes the stress placed on beauty, brawn and brains knows his child is forced to compete in world that worships those attributes. Should he help encourage his “average” child to excel in school? I can give you only one opinion. I feel I must help my child compete in his world as best he can.

If he is struggling in school, I will seek special coaching. We are allies in his fight for survival. But while helping my child to compete, I also instruct him in the true values of life: love for mankind, integrity, truthfulness, and devotion to Allah. Discipline With Respect Does punishment, and particularly spanking, break the spirit of a child? The answer depends on the manner and intent of the parents.

A spanking, in response to willful defiance, is a worthwhile tool, but belief in corporal punishment is no excuse for taking about your frustrations on little child; it offers no license to punish him in front of others or treat him with disrespect. It is important to recognize however, that one way to damage self-esteem is to avoid discipline altogether. Parents are the symbols of justice and order, and a child wonders why they let him get away with doing harmful things if they really love him.

Avoid Overprotection Preparation for responsible adulthood is derived from training during childhood.