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Shiavault - a Vault of Shia Islamic Books Islamic Correspondence Course (book 3) Lesson 35 : Family Life in Islam (3) **1. Parents’ Status (A) FATHER** In the Islamic family system, the father is considered as the head of the family. Whenever some people form a group, they must also have a leader. For example, a soccer team needs a captain who would make sure each player follows their plan properly; a school needs a principal; a government needs a ruler.

“Family” is a group of people; and, therefore, it also needs a leader whom we call as “the head of the family”. As the head of the family, it is the father’s responsibility to provide the necessities of life for his dependants: his children, his wife (and elderly parents, if they are needy). What are the necessities of life? Food, dress, shelter, furniture, and whatever a person normally needs to live a respectable life.

The rights which a father has over his children are of three types: • Spiritual & Emotional: to love one’s father, and to deal with him in a humble, kind and merciful manner. • Physical: to cheerfully bear any hardship you may face in taking care of him; to talk gently to him; not to raise your voice or hands above his; and not to precede him in any way. • Financial: to fulfill his needs before he asks you for it.

Imam Zaynu ‘l-Abidin (a.s.) said: “It is the right of your father to realize that he is your root and you are his branch; and that without him you would have been non-existent. Therefore, whenever you find in yourself anything that is likeable, remember that your father is the basic means of that gift [of Allah] to you. And be thankful to Allah and grateful to your lather accordingly.” (B) MOTHER In Islam, the mother is a substitute head of the family.

In many Muslim societies, the father works outside the house, whereas the mother is in charge inside the house. As mentioned earlier, it is the father’s duty to provide the necessities of life for the children. If the father is dead, then it is the duty of the grandfather to provide for his grandchildren. Only when both, the father and the grandfather, are dead the duty of providing the necessities of life for the children fall upon the mother.

A mother’s basic duty towards her children is to love, nurture and train them as best as she can so that they may grow up as healthy and good Muslims.