When the first was asked the reason why he had complained he said...

When the first was asked the reason why he had complained he said, "This owes me money and I want to get my money back to the last penny." Imam Sadiq became angry, turned around and said to the creditor: "Have you not read God's statement in the Holy Quran": Fear the terrible reckoning; [Holy Quran: Ra'd 13:21] Do you think that this "terrible reckoning" refers to God's oppression of man.

No, verily by God: "They fear not but the deep investigation." Know that: "One who is so strict in investigating is committing evil." O' parents, young men and women, beware of strictness - especially in marriage . Avoid this inhumane act. Take it easy and provide the means for the marriage of your daughters and sons. This will prevent the spread of corruption and sin.

Use Your Own Case to Judge for Others The parents should remember that they themselves were once young and were very eager to get married. They wished their parents would provide the means for their marriage. They hoped their parents would let them marry in an environment full of love and kindness without imposing hard conditions.

If they observed that their parents raised issues or set up obstacles that might delay this divine cause, they would get upset with their parents and would even hate them. Now that they are in the past position of their parents and want to marry off their sons or daughters, they should put themselves in their child's shoes. They should consider their hopes and aspirations, the pressure of their carnal desires and their strong will to establish a new life.

This could lead to leniency and can simplify the marriage of their offspring. The Commander of the Faithful Ali (Pbuh) has pointed this out in an important tradition: To better understand the facts of life and human issues, use your own case to judge for others. Prefer for others what you prefer for yourself. Dislike for others what you dislike for yourself. Just as you do not like anyone to oppress you, do not oppress others. Just as you like to be treated well, treat others well.

Consider bad for others what you consider bad for yourself. Be happy with people in cases in which you expect them to be happy with you. Imam Hassan Mujtaba (Pbuh) said: Live with people the way you like them to live with you." [Mizan al-Hikmat , v.6, p.316] This is what Islam duly expects of all. This is the beneficial decree of the religion. This is the way that makes it easy to live with others, and prevents sins from corrupting our lives.