19- Thou hast seen...

19- Thou hast seen, my God, the flow of my tears in fear of Thee, the throbbing of my heart in dread of Thee, and the infirmity of my limbs in awe of Thee. 20- All this from my shame before Thee because of my evil works! So my voice has become silent, no longer crying to Thee, and my tongue has gone dumb, no longer whispering in prayer. 21- My God, so to Thee belongs praise! How many of my flaws Thou hast covered over without exposing me!

How many of my sins Thou hast cloaked without making me notorious! How many faults I have committed, yet Thou didst not tear away from me their covering, collar me with their detested disgrace, or make their dishonour plain to those of my neighbours who search for my defects and to those who envy Thy favour toward me! 22- But that did not prevent me from passing on to the evil that Thou knowest from me! 23- So who is more ignorant than I, my God, of his own right conduct?

Who is more heedless than I of his own good fortune? Who is further than I from seeking to set himself right? For I spend the provision Thou deliverest to me in the disobedience Thou hast prohibited to me! Who sinks more deeply into falsehood and is more intensely audacious in evil than I?

For I hesitate between Thy call and the call of Satan and then follow his call without being blind in my knowledge of him or forgetful in my memory of him, 24- while I am certain that Thy call takes to the Garden and his call takes to the Fire! 25- Glory be to Thee! How marvellous the witness I bear against my own soul and the enumeration of my own hidden affairs! 26- And more marvellous than that is Thy lack of haste with me, Thy slowness in attending to me!

That is not because I possess honour with Thee, but because Thou waitest patiently for me and art bountiful toward me that I may refrain from disobedience displeasing to Thee and abstain from evil deeds that disgrace me, and because Thou lovest to pardon me more than to punish!

27- But I, my God, am more numerous in sins, uglier in footsteps, more repulsive in acts, more reckless in rushing into falsehood, weaker in awakening to Thy obedience, and less attentive and heedful toward Thy threats, than that I could number for Thee my faults or have the power to recount my sins. 28- I only scold my own soul, craving Thy gentleness, through which the affairs of sinners are set right, and hoping for Thy mercy, through which the necks of the offenders are freed.