I thought that maybe I could find some comfort in it...

I thought that maybe I could find some comfort in it, and I knew that no matter what, God knew the truth about everything that everybody does and that no amount of gossip and lies could change that. I had always believed that hard times were never given to us to stop us, but to help us grow. With that in mind, I was determined to stay in Japan for the whole year and somehow try and stop the ridiculous rumours. Alhamdulillah I was able to do that.

From that year I came to understand that not only is every culture different, but also they both have good points and bad points. I came to understand that it wasnt a culture that I was searching for... but something else. I attended an all girls Buddhist school in Japan. We had a gathering each week where we prayed, sang songs and listened to the principal give us lengthy talks. At first I wasnt comfortable attending these gatherings.

I was given a copy of the songbook along with the beads that you put over your hands when you pray. I tried to get out of going to them at the start, but then decided that I didnt have to place the same meaning to things as others did. When I prayed, I prayed to the same God that I had always prayed to - the One and Only God. I cant say that I really understand Buddhism. Whenever I tried to find out more I met with dead ends. I even asked a Japanese man who taught English.

He had often been to America and he said that in Japan he was Buddhist, and in American he was Christian. There were some things about Buddhism that I found interesting, but it wasnt something that I could consider a religion. In a lot of ways I picked what I liked out of religions and spiritual philosophies and formed what I considered to be my Own Religion.

I collected philosophical quote after quote in high school, read into things such as the Celestine Prophecy and Angels when I returned to Australia, and still held onto the Christian beliefs that made sense to me. I felt like I was continually searching for the truth. When I returned to Australia from Japan I had grown closer to a girl that I went to high school with.

She was always somebody who I considered to be a good friend, but wasnt in my group of friends whom I sat with in class or for lunch. Some of the people in that group I havent heard from and havent seen since I returned. I realised that this other girl and I had a lot more in common than I had first thought.