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Shiavault - a Vault of Shia Islamic Books Ethical Discourses: Volume 2 Discourse 34: An Unpleasant Demeanor قَالَ رَسُولُ اللٌّهِ: يَا عَلِيُّ! لِكُلِّ ذَنْـبٍ تَوْبَةٌ إِلاَّ سُوءُ الْخُلْقِ فَإِنَّ صَاحِبَهُ كُلَّمَا خَرَجَ مِنْ ذَنْبٍ دَخَلَ فِي ذَنْبٍ. The (S) has said, “O' ‘Ali!

There is repentance for every sin except for having a bad demeanor, since every time a person who has an unpleasant demeanor leaves one sin, he will enter into (another) sin.”[^1] In this tradition, the Noble Prophet (S) has pointed to the dangerous effect of having an unpleasant demeanor and has stated that, “People are able to ask repentance for all sins, however the person who has the characteristic and sin of an unpleasant demeanor will not be able to repent for this act as this trait never leaves a person.” It is important to note that a person can repent for his sins and bad deeds, however the trait of having an unpleasant demeanor is not in itself an action that one can repent for.

The Effects of Having an Unpleasant Demeanor Having an unpleasant demeanor is itself the source of many sins.

A person who has this trait wishes to repent for his sin, however he ends up falling into another sin and thus, as the Prophet (S) himself has said, “This person can not ask for repentance.” Thus, one of the effects of having an unpleasant demeanor is that a person would have multiple sins on his record such as annoying other people, lying, back-biting, oppression, etc… Another effect of having an unpleasant demeanor is the societal effects.

Thus, along with this trait, a person would gain the resentment of the people. Due to having a negative attitude, a person would end up losing his composure thus also losing his friends, support of the society and any influence he may have in society.

For example, a business man who possesses this trait may end up losing his clientele; a leader of the community may end up losing his followers!p In summary, having a negative disposition would lead to a person losing his friends and associates and it is even possible that such a person would lose his spouce and children! What do we mean by a person “losing” certain individuals?

This means that these people would be come strangers in his life and it may even reach a point that one's own children would not even like to see the face of their father since they know that their father has very bad etiquette! Thus, a separation would be created between the father and his children.