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Shiavault - a Vault of Shia Islamic Books Youth and Spouse Selection Chapter Four: Difficulties and Hurdles of Marriage Whenever it is said to a youth “Marry”, he instantly presents the problems, difficulties, and hurdles of marriage and the first difficulty that he discusses is the economical and financial matters. He then counts the other problems one by one. It is a fact that there are really lots of difficulties on the way to marriage, which cannot be neglected.

In this chapter, by the will of Allah, we shall consider these difficulties, impediments and obstacles and contemplate the solutions to them. Difficulties: Real or Artificial? Alas, our society still remains a far distance from the true and pure Mohammadan Islam. Ah! Still its face is hidden behind the curtain of many problems.

And the curtains of ignorance, false habits and customs, selfishness polytheism and egoism have hindered the radiant sun of Islam, depriving society of its life-giving glare. Had Islam been the standard and criterion in marriage and spouse choosing, most or all of these difficulties would not have existed. But which Islam? According to Imam Khomeini (r.a) pure Mohammadan Islam, not American Islam. Pure Islam is the same as the Prophet (S) originated.

Have we not read and heard about the glorious Prophet (S)? That he executed all the stages of marriage, i.e .engagement, fixation of dowry, and recitation of marriage service, in the span of a few minutes, and handed the husband and wife to each other and sent them to their home? These are not myths, not even miracles.

Still the pure Mohammadan Islam is the same and has the same strength and quality, but it is we who are not pure Muslims (all our shortcomings are due to “our” Muslimhood, not to Islam). What To Do Now? In any case, difficulties and hindrances do exist, and their solutions and remedies must be found. These remedies and solutions are of two kinds: one is long term and the other is short term.

The long term ones are mostly related to the intelligentsia, the rulers, reformers, think tanks and the trainers of the nation and society, who should seek solutions for the entire society and its welfare. And the short term ones are mostly connected to the youth and their parents themselves, who must seek the immediate solution as to what must be done in these circumstances and conditions. At the moment, we are not going to talk about the long term solutions.

They may be discussed independently at another time.